Monday, December 10, 2007

All Systems Go



I will be gazing across the water towards Cape Canaveral by this afternoon where the shuttle Atlantis either already took off, or will soon take off on another mission to what I suspect is little more than a poorly kept trailer in the sky, the International Space Station. Like the shuttle, my new mission is inexorably underway. Miles were logged this weekend, with four consecutive days out on the new bike. Aside from a drool problem which threatens to prematurely degrade the top tube, all heat shields are in place and I expect a smooth ride. The only thing between me and total redemption is a lot of time and pain. My time, your pain!

I don't want to go to work this week, down in the yawning maw of the Beeline Expressway. I exit this morning with my bottom lip leading the way by a good yard and my arms folded across my chest like I'm in a straight jacket. I have found over the years though, that I can do many things I don't want to do by simply leaning forward into the breach and bringing my feet with me.

Conch fritters and Law and Order in a hotel bed is no way to train.

In order to avoid any awkwardness during the San Felasco weekend, I have booked travel on a commercial airplane to a foreign country. That's right, I'm calling an "international" as in, "I would love to kick your ass at San Felasco, but I will be out of the country." Take that you hijos de putas!

I will be collecting Mel (not his real name) on Friday and bringing him to town for the weekend. So far we have not discussed a ride, but we have discussed dining at Huckleberry's BBQ in Fanning Springs so make of it what you will.

To my gentle readers who do not lay awake at night scheming to dismantle my hopes and dreams, I will miss you this week, and I am sure I will manage a dispatch from the road somewhere.

Every journey begins with a single schlep...

juancho

27 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Terrific post, Brother Juancho. I still think having Sasquatch do a substitute post for you on his amazing diet success would be a good idea.
In the meantime though, travel safely and remember- studies have shown that visualization techniques are highly effective for athletic endeavors. If you can't ride, just imagining yourself riding. Or something like that.
I really have no idea how that works.

Anonymous said...

Tell Mel, if that's REALLY his name, that we say hi. We'll look after your bike, the caretaker at your casa is easily distracted by 16oz. containers...
enjoy,

Human Wrecking Ball said...

Some other rat may be jumping from the sinking S.S. Jamis!
Details to follow!
God spead Juancho!
W.B.

That Hank said...

Hey man, what's your email?

drunkonpabst at gmail dot com

sasquatch said...

That's right, Juancho, if you can't ride, just imagine yourself riding. It's almost as effective, and the imagined results are incredible.

Ms. Moon said...

Sasquatch! You read that study too, huh?

Anonymous said...

One thing I think is great about this technique is that you can just as easily imagine your bu-t-t not sore while you're at it!! :)

Btw, if I can borrow your space for an inch, thanks for calling, hijito. I know you're with us in spirit up here. :(

nicol said...

I second Ms. Moon's vote/request for the shrinking Sasquatch diet success post in the absence of Juancho.

John said...

Absence of Juancho?! Not a chance. Please though Sasquatch, do inform us of your incredibly satisfying diet.

W.B. I can only hope it is you, e-mail me the details please. I hope it is something awesome and not a recumbent or trike.

nicol said...

Haaha! Clarification: I meant 'temporary or brief' absence. Juancho will certainly need to return to his newly built baby.

Anonymous said...

Hey! Recumbents are awesome! mutter.. mutter ...mutter...

Juancho said...

I brought baby down in the car seat.

Ms. Moon said...

As well you should have. Don't want to interfere with the bonding process.

Human Wrecking Ball said...

I have a recumbent couch and a recliner! I love them both.
Big Worm found me a Giant Trance (@wheelworld.com) for $299.00! The price was stupid and my Jamis won't hold a headset anymore so it was on.
Plus, I couldn't live with the fact that Jauncho had a new ride. I tried imagining a better bike but, "There's nothing like the real thing Baby!"
w.b.

Juancho said...

Ooo, the Trance. I know someone really fast who rides one of those, and you do too.

mmmm, it's not you though...

Juancho said...

Let's just hang out down here today...I got 4 hours of sleep, and yet I'm still tired...perhaps more elipses (ellipses?)will help.

I'm just up the road from Titusville btw.

Human Wrecking Ball said...

Easy there tubby, I don't want to bring up how I had to wait on you every five feet on our last ride.....oops, that slipped out didn't it?
W.B.Z.N.

Juancho said...

You only waited so you could learn how to ride over the hard stuff.

Ample said...

Have a great trip my friend :)

Human Wrecking Ball said...

That,s true, sorry man I was lashing out!
We did roll the little bridge, didn't we?
I don't think you're tubby....just rotund, or husky.
kay bye.
w.b.

Anonymous said...

Sons of whores??!?!?!

Espere hasta que le digo a las Hijas de heroĆ­nas.

We'll just have to do the pre-falasco
strike-outs without you!

Anonymous said...

hey, freaky bikes on the local craigslist thing; I think the trike is for team-building exercises, LET'S RIDE BIKES together.
Oh, and tubby? rotund? I think he's just "core-centric"!
yo quiero lo tenere (or whatever the infinitive of that verb is)
Mag

John said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Juancho said...

Making a list, checking it twice, King and Kong gonna put some chumps' nuts in the vise.

BIGWORM said...

Juancho Clause is comin'
to towwwnnnn!

Human Wrecking Ball said...

Whats the record for most responses?
w.b.

Juancho said...

I don't know, but we have to be close! Are you on the new ride yet?