Monday, September 12, 2005

The Cutting Edge

I knew it was going to be a fast ride when I hit the turn off of Waverly and banked into the park at Mach speed, narrowly threading the gap between the wooden fence and the speed limit sign. I had a smug laugh with myself about dropping everyone, and then I realized they were right on my wheel, grimly clamped like a row of snapping turtles.

The sun was warm, but the breeze was cool, and like everyone's favorite rock star boyfriend says, " It felt like I had no chain". We rode north into what S'quatch described as fox country, and it is true. Rolling green fields with huge and gothic live Oaks scattered across acre after acre.

We jumped in the lake and had what is sure to be one of the last swims of the summer. We played sprint/ attack all the way back to 10th Ave. Headquarters. Absolutely fucking awesome ride.

Riverboat recently asked the question, "Why don't you make your blog about something more than biking" and I am struggling for the right way to put this..."It's Not About the Bike".

Come on, that was a joke. Of course it's about the bike. Lance doesn't know what he's talking about. I guess when I started this thing, which happened late one night after a bottle of Ravenswood Zin, I was reliving the glory and hilarity of the 12 hours of Razorback. The Big Ring Bakery came to mind (Our black market Boston-cream filled cupcake operation) and I thought, "What a Circus". Boom. Done. A blog is born.

For me, mountain biking is something that I can think and write about every day, so it works. There are already too many sites out there about Sex, Drugs, and Rock-n-Roll so really, what was left? Besides, I'm open to any tangent off the trail, just ask S'quatch. I'll take this thing anywhere you want to go. Except Politics. If you take it to politics, then pray you agree with me, that's all I'm saying. I really lose it sometimes and I'm likely to say something nasty. I don't want that, it stresses me out. Nobody ever changes their mind anyway, especially me. Bitch.

See? Nobody said anything and I'm already pissed so no politics.

Pre-approved tangents:

Poker Night
D&D (I'll handle the mockery, you handle the dice)
married vs. single debate (always enlightening-seriously)
Guinness
Love
Magic
Space (physical, not Outer)
Freedom
Huckleberry Finn
Mexican Professional Wrestling
Motivation
Conviction
anything qualifying as "Epic"
Old friends
New friends
Life vs. Death (Where do you stand?)
Place
Purpose
Principles
Words that start with P
Turpentine
Barbed Wire
Gangster, or other, rap
Florida and southern tradition
Food-hell yeah, let's talk about food


Things you should probably look elsewhere for, (surefire blog-killers)

College football in more than a passing reference (We kicked Citadel's ass)
goofy, zany, or madcap internet photographs.
biking as a "recreation or sport" rather than a reason to live.
Baseball- nothing sucks like baseball sucks
Politics & Religion
Dumb or Dirty jokes- I prefer my profanity to be relevant and potent.

OK? Simple enough right? We're the "Big Tent Party", plenty of room for everyone under the Big Top.

Now that we have that settled- who's riding today?

"I" says this guy.

El J

14 comments:

Dr. Detroit said...

How about current events. You missed a great opportunity to comment on World Naked Gardening Day this last Saturday. I know the football game was overshadowing this important event but us naked gardeners felt a bit slighted.

juancho said...

It's always something with you people.

Dr. Detroit said...

There's just no pleasing some people.

ProfessorSlaw said...

Poker night! Poker night! Let me live vicariously through 10th Avenue until we get our own poker night going up here!

juancho said...

OK. Here's how to do it. Get a bunch of beer, like way more than can fit in your fridge. Drink it all. Smoke a lot of cigarettes, occasionally have two going at the same time, in different ashtrays. Randomly accuse Dr. Detroit of "smoking your 'grit or stealing your lighter". Bicker amongst yourselves about the true proncunciation of 'pronunciation'or whether Manatee flippers used to be feet. One of you give the other one a jar of change at the end of the night and Voila! Poker Night!

Oh and don't forget to yell SHMOOLIE! at exactly 11:30 P:M right before going to the bar for 6 or 7 "wind down" beers.

Riverboat said...

I'm not a bike hater, I just wanted some breadth. Like why don't you ever cover the explosion of goth culture among the Japanese?

hitops said...

Since when are recreation and a reason to live mutually inconsistent?

I dug Sunday's outing, apart from when Sasquatch pushed me into the lake while I was taking in a nice draw of fresh air. Spit, sputter. Not nearly as bad as when he aggravated your cracked tooth. Gotta member that skunk-apes, like cats, are never truly domesticated.

Thanks, boys, for staying on stuff I could ride.

juancho said...

Actually, the goth culture is only dominant among the midgets, or "little people" of Japan. You should know that. Now go get an f'in bike already.

And HT, I ain't falling for your sandbag, rope a dope tactics. Next time it's a Redbug beatdown for you.

sasquatch said...

Leave it to Juancho to openly offer non-bike blogation just when the biking's about to get good. I say stick to your damn roots, and here's a topic or two:

The ADVANTAGES of the big man on the bike.

The thrill of the spill.

National Geographic Moments, like the time you jumped the gator or lay down eyeball to eyeball with the snake.

How exactly does biking and weight loss work?

The mystery of recovery.

Stair riding.

Bike Shop: vibe, and/or politics and/or policies, and/or groupies, and/or heroes, and/or villains, and/or stories.

Life at Joe's (a regular column)

Bike fashion (riding with Molly Ringwald).

Trail hate

Motorists

Bikes and dogs

Your plans to embrace the road as an extension of your full biking potential.

Girlfriends or wives who are jealous of bikes.

Local bike heroes.

Riding without an established alpha

Psychological positioning, or frames that can't be beat.

Why stop here? or the never-ending battle for where the period belongs in the ongoing sentence of biking domination.

Dr. Detroit said...

To stay on my current events theme: I read this morning that a biker is being charged for manslaughter after he ran a stop sign and struck and killed a 76 year old woman. I have never ridden with you hellions but I imagine you view stop signs the same way you view smoking; why stop?

nOTSO said...
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nOTSO said...
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nOTSO said...

Another tally mtb'er here. Up for riding with your troop if you can handle one more. Followed the blog for a bit, good stuff, fun to read about the local scene.

thisoldhusband

ps previously posted a couple of things, but didn't realize they don't go away completely when you trash them.

juancho said...

Sure, but then I have to recruit an unmarried, unmotivated dude who lives in a hovel to keep things balanced.

Do you ride with a posse or are you a lone wolf?