Thursday, April 27, 2006

If I was Godzilla (and I might be)

I would stomp the new apartment complex that is being built next to the Munson Trail into matchsticks.

I would use my long stride to walk back to the mountains in a matter of hours.

I would go down to the State Capitol and have a word or two with Jeb, man to monster.

I would probably have to ride a 29'er (God Forbid!)

I would eat handfuls of road bikers like popcorn.

I would use my fiery blast to cook brats, steaks, eggplant slices, and whatnot for all my friends.

I would stomp a swimming pool in my backyard before it gets too hot.

I would drink every one of you under the table due to my gargantuan liver.

I would track down Mothra, and Rodan, and settle their hash once and for all.

I've had three days of total rest, I am ready to unleash the beast out there today.




Dr. Detroit said...

Your liver is already giant and you already can drink everyone under the table.

juancho said...

Except you.

Joe Developer said...

My liver is growing daily(it's not a beer belly), it's sure to be larger than yours!
It'll need it's own apartment complex soon, maybe one being built on some waste of sandy land by the road.

Sascha said...

I would eat handfuls of road bikers like popcorn.

How very kinky.

la duena said...

Personally, I like a bit of attitude. I'm trying to learn that from you, Juancho. How about loaning me a bit of testosterone?
Instead of "la duena," I could call myself "Mother of Godzilla" and buy a really MEAN bike!!

sasquatch said...

Damn, Sascha, when you're not hatin on your sweet, simple neighbors, your mind is in the gutter! I'm charging you with mental sex crimes, you dirty girl.

And Godzilla, this fantasy serves your desire to be beast enough to sit astride a 29er. You'd love beach-cruisin through the trembling wood, smashing through the troublesome trail debris.

juancho said...

And daintily dismounting to step over every obstacle. Yes, I crave it.

Sascha said...

Yes Sasquatch. I'm a dirty girl.

juancho said...

Buy a ticket already.